Nowhere does the contrast between traditional Nigerian values and attitudes and western ones, seem more apparent than on the institution of marriage, particularly on the actual wedding ceremony. The ritualized and inherently traditional aspects of the wedding are often explained as a superficial attempt at harmonizing the old with the new. Yet a deeper analysis seems to indicate that if anything, it is the western-style aspects of a wedding which are functionally less important. The traditional engagement ceremonies and the flamboyance of the actual wedding are both important in expressing and maintaining certain values within society.

Perhaps, the amazing endurance of traditional engagement ceremonies is proof of this. Unlike other aspects of the wedding, the whole ceremony owes nothing to western influence and although this generation talks indulgently of giving in to the whims of their parents, they would never dream of doing away with it. The ceremony seems to be expressive of certain important relationships in the family unit.

It is primarily an indication that the family is much larger than the western style nuclear family and almost every one who plays some part in the ceremony is a member of the extended family. The man’s relatives, at the start of the ceremony, come to beg on his behalf for the hand of his wife to be. This often takes place before the wedding. Although it has no real practical meaning, it is expressive of an awareness of the worth of a wife and the respect which her in-laws intend to give her after the wedding.

The offering of a dowry is still part of the exchange. Much good natured haggling over the worth of one’s daughter interms of yams, material and other items, still goes on. The fact that these commodities which were previously a means of exchange have not completely given way to the use of money, indicate clearly that it is symbolic rather than material value of the exchange which is important.

The blessing by the older members of the family is another important aspect of the ceremony. There seems to be a belief that the prayers (or curses) of the old are more powerful than those of the other members of the community. So much so, that people who have been married abroad often have to go through the formalities of a traditional engagement on arrival at home, and receive the blessings of their parents.

The wedding day itself is a successful harmonization of old and new. A church wedding provides the best example of a fusion of the two cultures. Every aspect of a western church service is somehow exaggerated or parodied until it bears an unmistakably Nigerian flavour.

Perhaps these aspects appear more pronounced today because they present a striking contrast to the solemnity of a Christian wedding because people have more flamboyant means of celebration at their disposal. Yet an examination of the past will show these same elements of festive celebration in weddings and other transitional phases in one’s life to another, with a minimum of psychological upset.

One cannot therefore underestimate the persistence of traditional values and attitudes in certain spheres of Nigerian and indeed African life and attribute them to mere chance. They have a definite, if unrecognized, psychological function which seems to be the real explanation of their endurance.

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